Thinking of…

…babies. My friend Michal just had her 2nd baby today. She is so beautiful. And another friend is working on baby 2 now.

And I have been thinking of baby 2 for quite some time now..but what’s the right time?

For a while I thought I’d wait for Nathan to gain some skills…when he can sit I’ll have the next baby…when he can hold up his head I’ll have the next baby…when he can communicate better I’ll have the next baby. But then all that melts away and you see the person in front and then you realize that just like any other child he would love to have a sibbling to play with. Especially a sibbling that will entertain him and make him laugh.

So it’s not about Nathan being ready. It’s about us being ready.

Part of me is so ready. But another part wants to give this baby a good chance. My latest thought is to wait until my body is as healthy as it can be. Part of me thinks I should wait until the candida is gone, my thyroid is stable, and all the other stuff that Dr. Dituro is treating. Because I want to give this baby a chance of being healthy and typical.

So it gets really gray, as you can imagine. Because I love Nathan for who he is – and he is perfect the way he is. But I am trying to do anything I can to give his sibbling a chance of being what Nathan is not – typical. ANd the thing is – part of me almost WANTS another special needs child. Because if anyone can take care of a SN kids it’s us. We have all the equipment. We have the knowledge. We can now write the manual that we wish Nathan came with.

But I do want to get myself healthy before I embark on another journey.

How did you know it was the right time to have your 2nd baby? Is there ever a right time? How do you know you are ready?

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