A little piece of heaven

What an explosion of development and personality this last month brouht for Mr. Gryffin! He became such the character! And learned SO MANY new skills!

It started with him mastering rolling in both directions – something he could do before, but he started taking it to the next level by rolling quickly from belly to back to belly. All of a sudden he found himself getting places! And oh, the freedom this brought! He started reaching all sorts of new toys, exploring new areas, learned what it meant to get into trouble.

And talking about getting into trouble, Gryffin is well known in our house to be a little thief. Any little bit of food he can find, he will find a way to it, and start gnawing on it. The other day Owen bought some french fries, and a couple fell on the ground. While he fed Nathan, he failed to notice that Gryffin was very quiet. Finally he looked over and found him polishing what was left of a french fry.

And talking about food. We started giving him solids about a week into his 5th month. You saw the video. He LOVED it. It was with pain in my heart that I had to back off the food for him. We noticed that every time he ate, he got constipated. Our homeopathic doctor warned me that he wasn’t ready. She advised me to wait until he got his first tooth, as she explained that’s when he would develop the proper enzymes for digestion. After trying it out and noticing not just constipation but tummy pains, we’ve backed off solids, so he’s back to exclusively drinking breast milk.

But this hasn’t stopped him from becoming our bouncing fool. He LOVES to bounce! No more words needed:

And how could I forget to mention that Mr. Gryffin is now crawling? Still he is just learning, he will take a step or two and fall, but he is crawling! He army crawls to get around, he belly flops to get around, he rolls to get around. This month we noticed that he has a little bit of my temper. He is very impatient and gets angry when he can’t do what he wants to do. Once he gets himself up into quadruped, he tries to crawl. His brain isn’t quite ready for crawling so he can’t quite coordinate the movement, so he falls. He then gets angry and starts fussing, just because he can’t do what he wants to.

Which leads me to his new nickname: Grumpylstiltskin. Our happy dwarf has shown his very grumpy side this month. He gets mad when he’s alone. He gets mad when he can’t do what he wants to do. He gets mad when he doesn’t get fed instantly. He gets mad if he’s in the swing and we don’t push him right away. He gets mad if he’s not being held. He’s quite a charming grumpylstiltskin, and one that we are all happy to please. Owen and I love to say that he’s “such a baby”, because he actually likes the things that picture perfect babies like – toys that make sound, playing with his feet, playing with rattles and other normal baby toys. Nathan never had that stage, Izzy pretty much skipped all of that completely…so with Gryffin we are getting to experience normal baby stuff.

This month revealed so much of Gryffin. It revealed more of his sweet nature, more of his temper, more of his will, more of his likes and dislikes. And it’s such a pleasure to watch this little boy unfold into such a character!

Our entire household has been sick with Streph throat. We are all on antibiotics. We have all been pretty miserable – streph is very uncomfortable! Nathan is baring it well but struggling to eat,so he keeps getting thinner and thinner. He’s been home from school all week getting a lot of TLC. Izzy is sick too but she’s so strong, she’s been baring it with grace, going to school, playing, enjoying herself. And Gryffin, my good baby, has been a bear. Grumpy, whiney, unhappy. I’m not sure if it’s the streph, or if he’s teething, or if he’s getting a little more spoiled as he gets older. But he just wants to be held all day.

On other news, Nathan continues to do great with his Dynavox. He is answering comprehension questions, and getting better and better at telling us what he wants. Yesterday, at the end of his session with Dr. Rogers, he went to the snack button, and asked for ice cream. I told him I’d get it for him but he had to wait a little bit, but he wasn’t satisfied with that. So he kept repeating over and over again, snack, ice cream, snack, ice cream. He repeated it until I finally gave up and got it for him (soy, not dairy, ice cream from Trader Joe’s). He is so good with that device, I am so impressed by him, when I try to calibrate it to my eyes and use it, I don’t do nearly as well.

And on to some AMAZING news. After 10 months of dealing with insurance, we finally got APPROVED for a nurse!!! We have been going around and around in circles, waiting and waiting, making phone calls, pushing papers, etc for EVER. Finally at the beginning of January I said – ENOUGH, and started calling all of the parties involved EVERY DAY. You heard me right. Every day. I picked up the phone and called. 90% of the time I left messages as these people never answer. But leave messages I did, again and again, until finallly I lit a fire under everybody. And it all came to fruition as we finally have approval for 150 hours of nursing / month. I interviewed a few candidates and picked somebody that seems smart and caring. I am hoping she will help us a lot to make sure Nathan gets everything he needs. She will be the one programming the device, helping him at school, making sure he eats enough, drinks enough, gets all his meds, gets stretched every day, his breathing treatments, etc etc. I am SO excited! I will let you guys know how it’s going.

And with that, I wish you with a warm wish to have an excellent weekend!

If you had asked me when I was a little girl what I wanted to be when I grew up, my answer would’ve been simple: A mommy. My favorite toy growing up was a pair of twin dolls that I was absolutely in love with. In my heart I always knew I’d be a mommy. However, I wanted to have 2 children. No more, no less.

Then Nathan was born with all his perfect imperfections and I wasn’t sure that I wanted more kids. After 3 years, I was ready to move on past his disability and focus on us as a family, not a couple caring for a disabled child.

By the time I was pregnant with Izzy I knew I couldn’t stop at 2. I wanted Izzy to have a friend to play with. I didn’t want Izzy alone caring for Nathan if something happened to us. I wanted at least 2 playmates to hang out with and support Nathan. I wanted them to support each other.

Now, with Izzy and Gryffin, I feel complete. The circle is closed. I know Nathan will have not just one but two people to care for him. They will care for each other.

During my c-section with Gryffin I had a tubal ligation. No more babies. My family is complete.

People often ask me if I was afraid to have more children after Nathan’s diagnosis. The answer is yes. Nathan’s problem is genetic so I feared that it would happen again. But I am so glad that I was brave and had the guts to have more kids. I can’t imagine my life without these 3.

I have many friends who struggle to conceive. It hurts to see them struggle as I know what a blessing each child is. I wish I could have children for everyone. It’s such a painful thing to struggle with. I wish there were easy answers for them. I sometimes feel guilty that I unplugged myself because of it.

For me, 3 kids is perfect. Watching as Gryffin wakes up a little more every day, watching him starting to play with Isabelle, watching her getting down to his level to interact with him, watching her trying to feed him and give him a tete (bottle) and change his diaper fills me with joy.

We are complete. And I am oh so grateful.